I tell myself all the time, that I need to do better at keeping my blog, i.e. journal, up to date, but life just passes me by so quickly. I think many times that I have nothing to say that is exciting so why put it in writing. I go to work, I take care of my family, I cook and clean, I serve in the church - so what is so exciting about all of that? One thing I do know, is I want people, especially my family, to know how grateful I am for them and for their love. They make me who I am and they are the reason my days sometimes seem so routine. However, I really would want it no other way. My goal is to make them happy and be the best they can be.
So, after a year, is there a way for me to remember all that has been said and done? There is not. I can highlight some fun points that have happened and try to do better going forward. We did go on a family cruise last year. Brittnie gave it to us for Christmas and we headed to the Caribbean. I love the warm weather! I love going on any type of vacation with my family and just relaxing. Cruises are a great way to do that. We played in the sun, rented four-wheelers, and of course, had to stop at Walt Disney World on our way home to go to the Halloween party. This year Rob convinced us all to dress as characters from the Haunted Mansion. Dressing up is so not my thing. I am not comfortable doing it, and I feel like I am never pretty enough for the costume I get. (In fact, my self esteem is always really low in that area. I never feel pretty and so wish I was and could feel that way). However, that is for another day.
It is always a great time when all of my kids are home. There have been few quick trips that Cortnie has come home for and Skyler will try to come down as well. We were able to all be together for Christmas this year which I always cherish. I love to spoil my kids rotten, but many times feel like I am just buying them "things" that will sit on a shelf. I have toyed many times with a Christmas vacation/trip, but Skyler tells me that is not Christmas and he would not go. Right now, I am more about memories than I am about stuff. Maybe one of these years, I will win. We are going on another cruise in the fall which is a Disney cruise. Cortnie is not sure she can come, but I sure hope it will work out that she can. I would love one more family cruise before our family changes,
That brings me to the biggest news, which is also the most recent. Cortnie is engaged! Jonathan proposed two weeks ago and I was told to keep it quiet as they were coming for a visit and she wanted to tell everyone. This is the first time Jonathan has been to Utah and the first time to meet many of our family members. He is very quiet but really opened up this time. I have seen a fun side of him before so it was fun to have that while we were here. I think he was a little bit overwhelmed with meeting everyone, but I am so glad he came. We spent all the nights playing card games and he can dish out the fun just like everyone else. They were only here for three days, but in that time we found Cortnie's bridal gown and looked at venues. The wedding is not until April or May (I so wish it was this fall, but I have to honor their wished) so we have lots of time to plan. I worry about buying a dress 10 months early, but she was afraid they would not sell it anymore so it is ordered. Let's hope it all works out! Our family is growing!
I will have to say I have been very concerned for Brittnie. I know her heart wants to be married so badly, but instead she gets to be the Maid of Honor at her sister's wedding. It is hard for her, but she is doing a pretty good job. She did not go back to Alaska this year, and I know she missed it. She started working as a benefits coordinator at my work and was afraid if she went back she would not have a job upon returning. She is trying to find a place to use her free cruise and someone to go with her. My heart prays that will happen. Rob and I are supposed to be going on a sibling trip to the Dominican Republic in two weeks, but my brothers have all dropped out. I keep wondering if we should go due to the wedding cost and feeling like maybe we should cruise with Brittnie. We have to decide by tonight though so that will be in my next post.
The boys are doing well. Skyler has been promoted at his work to a shift lead. He really enjoys working at this girls rehab center and helping the teenage girls find their lives again. He even volunteered to work on Christmas so they were not alone. Boyd is still struggling to find a job. I worry about him as he stays in his room a lot and misses church more than he goes. I so hope his testimony is stronger than I think.
Rob and I continue to struggle. We have personal struggles that we are working through. I love him so much, but sometimes I feel like it is not enough. I will admit I worry sometimes for our marriage. We love doing things together but that spark seems to be missing. We did go to Hawaii again this year with our friends and it was amazing. We had two sets of friends there (one was not planned but it ended up that way) and I am so glad. Mike and Sierra are like kids to us and we love to be with them and their kids. They were in Kauai with us and we swam, hiked, froze in waterfalls, and just had plain fun. James and Brenda went but it was different with them. Brenda has some health challenges, so she did not want to do a lot but I was in Hawaii and was going to enjoy myself. Hawaii is always a nice trip!
Life goes on. We have made it through more biking accidents, through an engagement, through job changes and so much more. Rob still struggles some days with his health, but we are learning to make the most of what we have. We are truly blessed. I am so grateful for all that I have. I am thankful for my Savior and to serve in the temple every week. I am so thankful for the green grass and my growing garden. It is so beautiful here and I am so grateful for it. Life is good - and I am happy.
